A Christmas day present to myself 25.12.2020 was 2 TIA’s; I was aged 58 at the time. And that is why I missed the queen’s speech along with my Christmas pud that day!

I started to feel extremely tired and slumped a bit to the right leaning against my hubby on the couch. I recovered quickly but ah hour so later I went again a second time and I didn’t recover so well. All the typical signs face arm/leg and speech went. My hubby and son decided I was having a stroke and phoned the ambulance.

At this point I could stand with some assistance, it’s just my right leg wouldn’t hold me up or go anywhere. My right arm was useless, all it wanted to do was hug me. And I couldn’t speak at all! Also had eating/swallowing issues, choking on my own saliva. Unless people asked me Yes/No type questions that I could nod or shake my head to, then I was well and truly stuffed.

So off to the hospital I went…alone…because of the covid lockdowns. In A&E I was given an asprin, had numerous tests/scans/xray done then whisked up to the stroke ward where I cried all night. I rested a lot, couldn’t sleep much so just kept my eyes closed. And it was so quiet there, probably due to it being Christmas holidays. Then physio started and continude at home.

5 days of boredom, all I could do was watch what was going on around me and listen and be told things and take it all in. In between physio and being taken out for more tests, scans, xrays or whatever. What surprises me to this day is that staff never even tried any other method for me to communicate to them.

By the third day I’d had enough. I managed to wheel myself down the ward on the overbed table just so I could hear what a lady was saying to me from the other end of the ward. She had terminal cancer, I had good listening ears and she really needed to talk. And I could make a few sounds in appropriate place by then. She’ll be dead now R.I.P. So it was worth getting told off by the nurse.

I refused all walking aids much to the staff’s consternation. To me, this stroke I had was mind over matter and natural survival instincts kicking in. I wasn’t as bad as others on the ward, two of which died in the night. So I just cruised the furniture or used my overbed table to get around.

There was a method in my madness, I was afraid of becoming overly dependent on walking aids, afraid they would hold me back in the long run. And to me that wasn’t conducive to my recovery, relearning all the how to’s, but that’s just me. I still had to be wheeled out when I left but at least I could kind of stand on my own two feet.

At home I spent the next year learning to walk and talk all over again, just like a child again. I did have physio/OT/etc visit me at home a couple times, speech therapy could only be by phone so no help there really. Anyway, I ditched them all after a couple weeks as none had anything new to offer to what I was doing myself already.

I had to regain the use of my arm/hand and leg, there were cognative issues, balance issues, eye tracking issues, short term memory lose, Aphasia - speach, reading issues, sensitive to noise, overwhelmed in conversation as well as in crowds, constant fatigue, the list can be endless. It took a long time, patience, effort and a lot of rest in between, but I got there in the end…and I’m still recovering.

I knew I wasn’t going to be driving any time soon, so I surrendered my licence as it was due to be renewed in 4mths time. A year later I got my driving licence back for which I eternally grateful. 16 months after my stroke I was back behind the wheel. I joined a Strength & Balance class as well as a circuit training class both run by AgeUK, my local walking club and the gym where I do my strength training.

I also joined an Aphasia self help group, mine is more Broca’s aphasia, much improved but still some my speech issues. The group helped enormously in giving me my confidence back speak despite what I sound like. That in turn gets you speaking more freely and so improvement continues to grow.

My stroke consultant said I had a TIA/mini stroke, but they are all strokes and another one could happen again at any time. And to this day I see it as a stroke becuase as a TIA, I did not recover quickly.

Today I still have mild issues I’m still working but on the whole I’m living a reasonably full and happy life with my current condition.