Andrew
There’s some interesting themes here.
My observation has been that those who seem to be having the most fruitful ‘rehab†’ journey are those who most quickly passed the denial stage.
The Küblar Ross grief curve runs Shock Anger Resistance Acceptance Healing and various others have expressed it similarly such as the Fisher.
One of the sources of invisible influence in all our lives all the time is the use of language. There are debates amongst linguists about whether words constrain what we feel or whether what we feel creates vocabulary.
I’m sure it’s a mixture of both even for one person. As such the word recovery and the phrase stroke survivor leave me with an inability to express things with confidence they will be heard and understood in the same manner in which I use them.
I am not a stroke survivor in any sense that ‘defines’ me.
I survived a stroke. Event. In the past. After-effects are persistent and fading and morphing.
Nor am I recovering. My life path was instantly altered and I strive everyday to make it better for me and Use my new found insights with old capabilities to make it better for others.
Perhaps what I could say is that “an improver” is a statement that defines me in that it encapsulates a principal or a theme to which I have returned throughout my life.
Maybe it’s correct to say a survivor defines a theme applicable to the last 5 years. Less than 1/12 my whole duration and I think I am unable to put a percentage to its scope
For example of the definitional part that improver conveys: I have audited many Service delivery operations and led multiple Service Improvement Projects within organisations and even more upskilling initiatives for others to do the same.
Now I attempt to use those capabilities in the direction of my improvement Post a stroke not in return to an old status quo hence recovery is the wrong word but “getting better” is a correct description
So part of the why do question’s answer comes back to what I think I said above which is the role of the therapist is as more about guide an individual explore their life path to which exercise can be usefully aligned but it is misunderstood as allocate clipping pegs to a cup and sprinkle a little goal setting dust around to make it seem like with a deeper understanding.
When the behaviours don’t match the imagined actions on either side and the words are not reliably useful and the mindsets not understood and often for the survivor that is their own mindset about their own current situation then some of the questions implied in conclusions become obvious and so do remedies.
6¢